10 Second Tip

Every success has a journey behind it. Challenge yourself to go beyond praising the moment your child succeeds to recognizing the steps it took to get there!

Courage Optimism Resilience Determination

Don't Take Away Hope

#6 Don't take away hope. Don't prepare for disappointment.

Children NEED their dreams. You might say "What does this have to do with their sense of independence?" but a child with a dream aspires to do what it takes to get there and make it happen. A child with a dream has motivation.

Maybe your child is a tad tone deaf and dreams of becoming a singer. Instead of dashing those dreams "Don't get your hopes up. There are a lot of talented voices out there," go with a response that speaks of something positive they DO display like "You'd have an awesome stage presence." Besides, dreams don't always live forever. I no longer want to be a ballerina. In fact, I never even took ballet. My parents gave me the ultimate gift of feeling like I could be successful at whatever I tried my hand at.

Our goal is self-governing people who CAN separate from us and function, living positive and happy lives no matter what they do!

Encourage Use of Outside Sources

#5 Encourage children to use sources outside the home.
It's ok to ask community members for help. We can seek information in a variety of ways (internet, library, personal experience, teachers, community helpers, professionals, etc.) Children need to be able to be "away" from their parents or caregiver and knowing whom to ask for help brings about confidence and security. Being able to ask for help when needed is huge! Knowing whom to ask is huge!

The result? Children feel empowered, and not completely dependent on us.

For example, a child inquiring about fire safety might be ready for a trip to the local firestation. A child interested in meerkats (C is!) can check out books from the local library. I want C to feel comfortable in certain situations and know when to raise a red flag. Being able to seek help or answers from others is a start.

#6 is big in THEIR minds. Wait for it and I think you'll see what I mean.

Asking Questions, Answering Questions

#3 and #4 refer to asking and answering questions so I've grouped them together.

#3 Don't ask too many questions.
This refers to the child feeling that questions are an invasion of privacy. I don't agree with this altogether, because sometimes asking questions IS necessary for you to gather information.

Try- Instead of a barrage of questions (HOW WAS SCHOOL? DID YOU HAVE ART? WHAT DID YOU MAKE? DO YOU LIKE THE ART TEACHER? HOW ABOUT THE COLOR BLUE?), ask in a way to invoke thought and response. There are going to be times children simply don't want to engage and that's OK! Anything that might invoke a response beyond YES or NO goes!

"Tell me something you enjoyed about your day..."

"Oh I see you had art today. How did that go?"

"You seem upset. I'm hear to listen if you need to talk about it..."

"I'd like to hear how your day went..."

"I'm interested in what you did at recess today..."

#4 Don't rush to answer questions.
Give children the opportunity to explore the answers to their own questions. Sometimes a pause or "Tell me what you think" goes a long way!

Stay tuned as #5 is tomorrow.

Give Information, Engage Cooperation

#2 Give information.
Giving information allows children to see for themselves what needs to be done. Giving information is just one of the ways to engage a child's cooperation:

a) DESCRIBE WHAT YOU SEE OR DESCRIBE THE PROBLEM.
"There are toys in the walkway."

b) GIVE INFORMATION.
"Someone might step on these toys and get hurt."

c) SAY IT WITH A WORD.
"The toys."

d) DESCRIBE WHAT YOU FEEL.
"I don't like tripping on toys."

e) WRITE A NOTE.
Please put me away so I'm safe from people's feet. Thanks, Your Toys

#3 and #4 coming tomorrow!

Encouraging Independence - Help Children Help Themselves

One of the books I've encountered since entering this field that I have a lot of praise for is How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.

This book gives fantastic information on communication; I'm particularly partial to the section about encouraging children's sense of autonomy because I think it portrays my vision of what a parent and teacher can accomplish by NOT doing things for a child.

1. Help children to help themselves.
*Are we helping a child more by TELLING them how to put on a coat, or SHOWING them how to do it and then letting them try? If I put C's coat on for him, I took away a learning experience. When we let a little bit of struggle happen, learning is taking place. The child gets pride in accomplishment AND the courage to persist the next time. If I put C's coat on for him, I took away a learning experience.

See tomorrow's post for #2!

Character Qualities

I've decided that as part of my curriculum I'd like to explore character qualities. The depth to which I can explore them will depend on the age group I ultimately end up with, but I feel that we can all benefit from examining that which builds a person's character. If I have toddlers, I will probably focus on one quality per month. Similarly, if I have preschoolers I would focus on one quality per month but they may differ slightly. It would look something like this, order TBD.

TODDLER
1. SELF-CONTROL (turn-taking, sharing, waiting in line, patience)
2. HONESTY (tell the truth, accept responsibility)
3. LOVE (being accepting, giving, caring)
4. FLEXIBILITY (able to adjust to change)
5. RESPECT (good manners, help others, listen to adults, kind words)
6. SENSITIVITY (understanding feelings, aware of emotions in self and others)
7. RESPONSIBILITY (good choices, accept consequences, good listener)
8. GENTLENESS (show personal care and concern, speak and act kindly)
9. SECURITY (what/who makes me feel safe and secure)
10. PERSEVERANCE (try, learn, work hard, be determined)
11. GRATEFULNESS (be thankful for what you have, give thanks)
12. FAIRNESS (share, take turns, cooperate, appreciate differences)

PRESCHOOLER
1. RESPONSIBILITY (good choices, accept consequences, good listener)
2. COMPASSION (be kind, helpful, considerate)
3. RESPECT (good manners, help others, listen to adults, kind words)
4. TRUSTWORTHINESS (be dependable, keep promises, tell the truth)
5. FAIRNESS (share, take turns, cooperate, appreciate differences)
6. ORDERLINESS (organized, thorough, time-aware)
7. CITIZENSHIP (be a good classmate/friend, respect the rules, do your best)
8. SELF-DISCIPLINE (do a good job, respectful words, best use of time)
9. HONESTY (tell the truth, accept responsibility)
10. INTEGRITY (be loyal, be your best, doing the right thing)
11. INITIATIVE (recognizing and doing what needs to be done before being asked)
12. TOLERANCE (accepting others)

Playground Safety, Slides

My "learn something new each day" thing learned. I'm guilty of doing this a few times myself!

Why sliding with kids is dangerous

Amos 'n Andy

My mom used to call this snack "Amos 'n Andy," the same things as Egg in a Basket, Popeye, Toad in the Hole, Egg in a Nest, Egg in a Frame...whatever you call it, it is easy and tasty!

Use a cookie cutter and cut a shape out of a piece of bread. Butter that empty bread and put it into the frying pan. Crack an egg into the shape. Fry both sides.

What's cool about making this for kids, besides that it's an easy breakfast is that you can cut out any shape the kids will enjoy, think holiday and seasonal!

Play Today

Think back to what you did with your child yesterday. I hope you fit in a little time for playing together. Playing together sends a message of love. I want to spend my time with you, doing things you enjoy. You deserve my time and attention!

So, what will you play today? The more imagination required, the better!

BOARD GAMES*DANCE COMPETITION*JOKE CONTEST*TEA PARTY*FOLLOW THE LEADER*MUD PIES*HIDE AND SEEK*OBSTACLE COURSE*CLOUD WATCHING*BIKE RIDES*TAG*CATCH*MAKE MUSIC*DRESS UP*I SPY*SPORTS*PUPPET SHOW*FORT*ART*BOOKS*BLOCKS*PRETEND*HOUSE*TREASURE HUNT*CARS AND TRUCKS*LEGOS*DOLLS*CHEFS*MODELS*CARDS*COLLECTIONS*PLAYDOUGH*RAKE LEAVES THEN JUMP CARELESSLY INTO THEM*ASK THEM WHAT THEY WANT TO PLAY

Play is after all, justification to stay young forever!

Toddler Property Laws

1. If I like it, it's mine.

2. If it's in my hand, it's mine.

3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.

4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.

5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.

6. If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.

7. If it looks just like mine, it is mine.

On Loving When Loving Gets Tough

I bet there are times when you've just had it with the whining/bickering/talking back. When you can't take one more "He touched me!" The arched-back temper tantrum in the middle of Costco has you pulling your hair out! Your child forgot something even though you've repeated a hundred times "Don't forget your (insert coat, backpack, homework, etc. here)!" At the point of anger, it's easy to overlook the message the child is sending...

"I want to be loved the most when I'm acting the most unloveable."

Ahhh, a cry for attention. And yes there are situations which call for denying that attention. But you have a CHOICE to react positively or negatively, keeping in mind that anger adds fuel to the fire.

In heated moments, remain calm and reassure your child I LOVE YOU. It is those times that they most need to hear it and probably the time you feel least able to say it! If you can manage, try "Listen, I love you like crazy and think we should talk about this in a few minutes once we've both calmed down." It's ok for parents to step away and take a time out. Children might even be intrigued if you say "I'm putting myself in time out so I can think about how to handle this." You'll come back refreshed and prepared to discipline with love instead of out of anger. And you are teaching your child a valuable lesson "I am loved NO MATTER WHAT."

10 Lessons the Arts Teach

A must-read about the benefits of teaching the arts to children:

National Art Education Association 10 Lessons Handout
SOURCE: Eisner, E. (2002). The Arts and the Creation of Mind, In Chapter 4, What the Arts Teach and How It Shows. (pp. 70-92). Yale University Press. Available from NAEA Publications.

Fishful Thinking

Pepperidge Farm & Goldfish introduce a parenting resource to help us instill positive thinking in our children.

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Numeral Identification

Area Tested: Numeral Identification

Recognition of numbers - your child is asked to identify the numbers 0-5 on a piece of paper that are in random order.

Activities to strengthen numeral identification:

1. Make flash cards and once the numeral is identified, count out the same number of objects

2. After counting a group of objects, write the numeral

3. Observe the calendar or clock

4. Write the numbers down on cards then shuffle and order them

5. Invent domino games

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Counting

Area tested: Counting

Counting of blocks - your child is asked to count blocks (6). We are checking for number recognition associated with the value.

Activities to strengthen counting:

1. Count objects, hands-on

2. Kitchen helper

3. Fingerplays

4. Count by listening to the sound of items dropped into a can and saying the numbers out loud

5. Count down to an exciting event in the child's life

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Self Portrait

Area Tested: Self Portrait

Self portrait - your child is asked to draw a self-portrait and we use a rubric to score the drawing. (I wish I had that rubric, just curious!)

Activities to strengthen drawing:

1. This one is about the materials you provide. Provide an array of colors, lots of paper, and a mirror too! It's much easier to draw a self-portrait after you've studied your features in a mirror.

2. Sing body parts songs & play body part location games

3. Study pictures of others, expressing appreciation for differences

4. Small manipulatives to strengthen hand muscles

5. Positive self-image

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Name Writing

Area Tested: Name Writing

Name writing - Your child is asked to print his/her name on a blank piece of paper. We check for hand dominance, pencil grip, formation of letters and directionality.

Activities to strengthen name writing:

1. Practice, practice, practice! You can create your own handwriting work sheets here:

Handwriting Worksheet Maker

2. Opportunity- find reasons for your child to sign their name like on a card to grandma or at the top of their paper child's menu at the restaurant

3. Purchase or print out lined handwriting practice paper and make it easily accessible

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Oral Language

Area Tested: Oral Language

Verbal skills - grammatical check - your child is asked to look at a picture within the book and tell what is happening on the page. We are listening for sentence structure and clarity while making association to what the picture may be about (does your child communicate in complete sentences and train of thought, etc.)

Activities to strengthen verbal skills:

1. Sings songs

2. Use full sentences, require responses in full sentences

Mom: "Would you like some more milk?"

Child: "Yes I'd like more milk please."

As compared to

Mom: "More milk?"

Child: "Yeah."

3. Go on a "picture walk" through a book. Have your child predict what will happen in the story by looking at the pictures before reading.

4. Let your child talk on the phone and practice the back and forth skills of conversation

5. Encourage language with a tape recorder

Kindergarten Screening Tools - Concepts About Print

Area Tested: Concepts About Print

Concepts of Print - your child is asked a series of questions about a book

Where is the front of a book? Where is the back of a book? Where would you begin reading? (locating the beginning of a sentence) Point to the first word in the sentence. Where would you stop reading? (locating the end of a sentence) Once you finish this page, where would you go next?

Activities to strengthen concepts of print:

1. Read, read, read! Ask questions about what you are reading.

2. Exposure to all kinds of print - books, magazines, comics, newspapers, print is everywhere!

3. Ask your child to re-tell a story they've heard several times

4. Predict what will happen in a story by looking at the pictures first

5. Point to each word as you read it aloud

To read further on assessing the concepts of print, see

Assessing the Student's Concepts about Print